Wes Knoll Paints a Different and Unapologetically Portrait of New York City, In His Book, Fading Smile
New York is often glamorized and an alluring place to outsiders, one that encourages people to move here with notions of what the city is before arriving. The photographer and New York born Wes Knoll paints a different and unapologetically portrait of the city he has always known, in his debut book, Fading Smile. A decade in creating this book, he discusses growing up in the city .
Photos courtesy of Wes Knoll
Your book Fading Smile, a decade in the making, is a real and raw look at scenes from your life growing up in New York. Looking back, what initially drew you to the camera, and inspired you to start documenting your environment?
I was drawn to photography and documenting my environment initially during middle school as I have always been an extreme individualist and think that I sought to create a world as I saw it. Others may not have seen the same place. I got a camera as a gift when I was 12 and began going to 5-Pointz before it closed to take photos of the graffiti. Then I used my bike and camera as an excuse to explore areas with which I was not familiar.
The following year, as a freshman in high school, I joined the dark room club and began shooting friends. I fell in love with the process, giving up my lunch time and free periods to spend time alone in the darkroom. As new friendships formed and the diversity of the world revealed itself, I was infatuated with the community I had developed as well as their lives, unique stories, and crazed adventures that I was immersing myself in. I knew that it needed to be documented, so I started doing so. I never looked back.
I love to write and initially had hundreds of pages of stories that I wanted to incorporate into Fading Smile, but eventually scrapped. I felt in tune with death, the ever fleetingness of life and its temporality, which is a huge reason why I write, photograph, and ultimately document. There is so much beauty that comes and goes in silence.
New York, known for being a “melting pot” of individuals from all walks of life, inspires people from around the globe to move here, as well as leave daily. How has being raised in an always- changing city shaped your art and process?
New York is my bread and butter. It has made me the person whom I am and I say that with a deep sense of pride and gratitude. I thrive away from the chaos, thumping energy and spontaneity that the city creates-which is ever-present in my work and the process.
Growing up here has given me a certain edge, a certain level of confidence as well as a certain lack of judgement from exposure to such a mixed bag at an early age. I never take it for granted and cherish it constantly. Three things that New York has taught me is the truth of the collective consciousness, no one person is better than any other and you truly never know what someone else is going through. Part of my work, if analyzed, feels like a love letter to this city-an attempt at paying homage to how much it has offered me.
I was in Mexico with my friend REBOE, after a chaotic trip where we were extorted by corrupt police officers, and we were relaxing on a beach at night when he espoused to me something that I always tell myself: “Change is the only constant in life,” which was something I struggled to accept growing up with the ever-changing seasons of friendships, to my city in the smallest of ways: Yellow cabs becoming Ubers, the quintessential old green garbage bins being replaced by the new ones being rolled out today, the retirement of the R42 train, etc. Rather than being a rock in the constant stream of water, I’ve gotten out of the way of change’s perpetual flow.
I think of New York at times as an unrequited lover-you will fall in love, be in love, and sacrifice everything for her but she will never love you back and will never stay the same. There’s this scene in a movie I enjoy called, My Dinner With Andre, where one of the characters speaks about how New Yorkers are always talking about wanting to leave the city but never actually do it. In response to being asked why, an answer is delivered along the lines of: “I think that New York is the new model for the penitentiary system, where the prison has been built by the inmates themselves, and the inmates are the guards, and they have this pride in this thing that they’ve built-they’ve built their own prison-and so they exist in a state of schizophrenia where they are both the guards + prisoners. As a result of having been lobotomized, they no longer have the capacity to leave the prison they’ve made or even to see it as a prison”. I think about this often times. But I always say, being born here is the best life sentence one can ever receive. Plus, where else can I play my favorite sport: walking in New York on a busy street- juking and weaving in a symphony of spontaneous and thoughtless chaos.
Your description of Fading Smile as a “raw portrait” is accurate, showcasing good, bad, and in-between moments of your life. What was the editing process like, in deciding what images to feature for the final print?
The editing process for this project was lengthy and the most difficult aspect of the project, aside from creating the written text. It was important for me to attempt to tell the narrative that lies beneath these images and this community of people. I drew nearly ten years of documentation, which felt like a herculean task. The book has gone through five or six iterations before finally arriving at where it is today.
Many images were scrapped due to privacy requests and moral responsibility, which was important for me to honor and respect. I I would have to say, editing the sequencing to reflect the story that I wanted to tell was one of the more time-consuming aspects of the process and one that was imperative to me. In my mind, the book has informal chapters and sections ranging from exploring New York City, graffiti, drug smuggling to cross country road trips (which I would go on every summer for four years) and more.
The book begins with imagery of kids climbing into a portal of darkness (to write graffiti on a highway in Paris) and ends with visions of death and handwritten love letters from broken relationships and lost loves. It ultimately concludes with a difficult-to-interpret abstract image, quite literally of the earth’s core, attempting to metaphorically ask viewers to investigate their inner selves, in order to make this project.
The book does not shy away from graphic and intense subject matters. Behind the camera, how do you come about some of the scenarios seen in the images?
I arrived at the images featured in the book by immersing myself in different places in the world, constantly exploring and seeking out the next adventure. I avoid saying no to things. I look to not just document moments but also to participate and create them without disturbing or interrupting them. My goal is to capture moments that have a sense of magical realism and spontaneity. This requires an immense level of awareness and fast thinking regarding one’s surroundings. The moments are always there, we just have to be present enough to see and accept them.
I believe in spirituality and exploring the soul of the human condition. I often try to become a selfless mirror for whatever subject I am shooting, removing myself from the process and attempting to capture that subject intimately and in a way that removes the muddied debris that the world throws from the purity of someone’s essence.
Besides New York, what are some other inspirations you draw from when shooting?
Besides New York, some other places of inspirations I draw from when shooting are books, films and museums. As corny as it may sound, the closest feeling to a religious one, is when immersing myself at a museum or within a work of art. When I am feeling depressed or down, a visit to one of the aforementioned leaves me feeling refreshed and rejuvenated with inspiration. Seeing charitable acts is something I do not overlook.
I am especially inspired by explorers of different cultures and by people’s stories and unique personalities. For me, books have always been a way to travel before I could do so on my own; I felt like I have been exposed to a great deal through this religious practice of constantly reading. I love autobiographies of extraordinary people, one of my favorites being Songs My Mother Taught Me by Marlon Brando. My favorite authors, which have provided me with an endless supply of inspiration are Herman Hesse, Henry Miller, Hunter S. Thompson, and Bret Easton Ellis. My favorite painter is Alberto Burri and my favorite filmmaker who inspires me is Paul Schrader. Lastly, I am always incredibly inspired by people’s stories of perseverance and determination.
Do any shots or pages that stick out as personal favorites viewers of the book should look out for?
Some pages that stick out as personal favorites are the road trip with friends and a tattoo collage as they display intimate and personal moments, one of which is a graffiti writer’s tattoo of a neanderthal with the text “EVOLVE” that covers up a suicide attempt. Another tattoo reads “Bompton Boys For Life RIP Nugget Balla” on a blood member’s bicep. I also smile every time I see the yellow piece of paper collaged that reads “text to get sucked 518-620-1216” as it reminds me of the two times this message and phone number was balled up and thrown at me from a car, as it sped away in the middle of the night while writing graffiti.
Some favorite images of mine are the following: my friend Anger’s hand scar in the shape of a question mark, with fresh and crudely applied stitches. My friend Greg got arrested in Acadia national park for larceny, after the police tracked our car for several days through Maine (taken from the back seat of a police car). A man who appeared homeless was not asking for money when he held a cardboard sign reading: “God Can See What Is In People’s Hearts..” Lastly, there is an image of my friend, Diego, taken in the wilderness of Colorado, after his dog ran away from home, printed on looseleaf paper. We had spent days combing a forest for her to no avail. After running away from a bear, we regrouped and were unsure about what to do next. Diego walked in the distance on this picturesquely beautiful day, going nowhere, more lost than I had ever seen him since the day we met, and it affected me greatly.
Fading Smile is an intimate and reminiscent body of work, and you can sense the passion that's been put into each page. Now that it’s published, what’s next for Wes Knoll?
There are too many things I seek to do next. A problem of mine is not spreading myself too thin. I have several photography projects I am working on-that vary from the work I have amassed traveling the world, such as a project on graffiti and the overlooked human gears that keep New York City running (e.g., public school crossing guard).
In addition to photography, I have a background in filmmaking, having helped edit the feature length documentary “Rolling Like Thunder” and having made several shorts of my own. So, I plan to work on a trilogy of short form documentaries that explore humanity’s cross-cultural obsession with pushing the limits of fear through seemingly absurd physical pursuits. The first of which is investigating the Running of The Bulls in Pamplona. At some point I plan to direct a feature length film of an adaptation of an old national bestseller about a young religious artist who is compulsively driven to envision the world as they see and feel, even when it leads them to blasphemy.
Social Media.
Instagram: @WesKn0ll
https://www.wesknoll.com
Interview by Ethan Engh, Contributor, PhotoBook Magazine
Tearsheets by Alexa Dyer, Graphic Designer, PhotoBook Magazine
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